Remona

Free yourself from tension – Ease the pressures of everyday living

Everyone experiences anxiety and tensions in various ways. These are our self-protective reactions, when we are confronted with anything that disturbs our well-being, happiness or our self-esteem.

An occasional bout of anxiety and tension may be unpleasant, but its quite normal and need not be a cause of concern. But we need to be aware and careful, when emotional upsets come frequently, upsets us and fails to wear off.

Below are few questions, to which your answers might help you to recognize when this happens.

• Do minor problems and small disappointments throw you into a confusion?
• Do you have a problem getting along with people, or do you sense that people find it difficult to get along with you?
• Do the small pleasures of life fail to satisfy you?
• Do you fear people or certain situations that never use to bother you?
• Do you feel inadequate, or in self-doubt?

If your answers to most of the above questions is YES, then below are few practical positive actions that will help you deal with the situations.

Talk it out : When something worries you, do not bottle it up. Confide your worry or whatever bothers you to some level-headed person you can trust. Talking things out, helps to relieve the strain, and helps you look at your problems or worry in a clearer light. And this helps you see what you can do about it.

Escape for a while : Sometimes a change of scene, or a change of atmosphere, like maybe reading a book, or watching a film, or even taking a walk in nature for a brief moment, will help you loosen up and helps you feel better. But be prepared to come back and deal with your difficulty when you are more composed, in better condition emotionally and intellectually.

Work off your Anger : If you find yourself using anger often as a general pattern of behaviour, remember that anger will generally leave you feeling foolish and sorry in the end. Anger is good at times, but you should use it at the right time, for the right reasons. Try to get yourself involved in some physical activity like gardening, or a game, or a long walk, this will help you relax and reduce the intensity of your anger.

Working the anger out of your system will leave you much better prepared to handle your problem intelligently.

Do something for others : If you are a person who constantly worries about yourself, try doing something for somebody else. This will take the steam out of your worries and give you a warm feeling of having done something satisfying.

Take one thing at a time : To people under stress and tension, even an ordinary task or workload looks so great that it’s painful to tackle or solve any part of it. When this happens, try to break up the task or work into smaller parts and tackle the most urgent tasks one thing at a time. Once you start doing this after a while you will realise that you are able to complete the whole task without much stress.

Go easy with Criticism : Some people expect too much from others, then feel let down, disappointed, frustrated, when another person doesn’t measure up. The “other person” maybe a partner, a wife, a husband or a child whom we are trying to fit into a preconceived pattern – or even trying to change them to suit ourselves. Remember that each person has the right to develop as an individual. People who constantly complain or who feel let down by the shortcomings (real or imagined) of their relatives are the ones who are disappointed about themselves. Instead of being critical about the other person’s behaviour, try to search and find some good things about the person and help them improve. By doing so, they feel happy and you will also have a sense of satisfaction and this will help you gain perspective about yourself.

Plan your recreation : Most people find it difficult to take time off. A set schedule of hours for recreation is actually beneficial for our physical and emotional well-being.

Most of the time, emotional difficulties arise out of practical problems, financial difficulties, trouble at work, problems with parents and children, or marital troubles. People do not realise that a person’s long-standing habits and attitudes may produce the conflicts. These internal and external forces tend to build up over time, making life stressful. In such cases we may need more help than we can give ourselves. Try to reach out to counsellors or life coaches who can help you deal with your problems.

The quest for peace of mind is universal. Some of us are blessed with all the internal and external circumstances that automatically assure it. We have to work to achieve it. This means having a better understanding of ourselves and others. It means working out our problems by ourselves when we can and seeking assistance / help when we need it.

NOTE : If you have any such problems and are finding it difficult to deal with it, and you feel you need some guidance please feel free to drop me an email through the contact page.